Wednesday, June 29, 2011


Be well-groomed. This is essential if you are even going to approach an attractive girl. Brush your hair, shower, wash your face, brush your teeth, use deodorant and maybe even a little cologne, and apply acne medicine daily (if you have a problem with your skin). Don't wear your pants off your butt, often called "sagging": it's not that attractive to the majority of girls. Wear clean, attractive clothes that fit. (If in doubt, get an older sister or close female friend to help you in this department.) Don't wear skin tight clothes, but don't wear clothes that are too baggy either. Girls hate that.

Have a great attitude. Be fun to hang around with, easy to laugh with, and be outgoing. Just don't be full of yourself. A girl may like an overly cocky guy at first, but eventually, she will find it selfish. Don't try to impress everyone: girls like humble guys. At the same time, a sense of humor is always good. Girls love when guys can make them laugh.

 Show respect. If you respect everyone and give them their space, they'll all respect you. With girls, it works even better. If they see you respecting everyone, and not getting pushed around while you're at it, they will be reassured that you will treat them right. Be kind to all.

Have nice conversations. Try to aim for you both to be speaking half of the time, but make sure that you are saying something worthwhile. It's not attractive when only one person talks endlessly or when they say bad words. Another thing to watch for is her attention. If she isn't paying complete attention, do not repeat yourself several times. This makes girls feel you are desperate, and usually annoying.

Show interest in her. Let her talk. The #1 mistake when talking to a girl is focusing on yourself. Girls are way more comfortable when they talk about common interests. Ask about her interests, hobbies, favorite books, music, etc. If she asks you a question, answer it in a few, short sentences and then redirect the question back at her. This engages her in the conversation. When in doubt, compliment her like your hair looks nice today. Even if a girl does not like you yet, complimenting her will make her feel good about herself and think positively about you. However, if she keeps redirecting the conversation back to you, talk about yourself, otherwise it seems like you don't really want to be talking to her.

Try flirting! Don't be obsessive! If you both make eye contact, do not be the one to look away, but do not stare for too long. When you both make eye contact, just give a slight smile. Touch her arm or shoulder for a few seconds. Physical contact is a great way to show you're interested. If she seems uncomfortable, do not do it again.
  • In general, you should leave physical contact until you both get to know each other more, especially if she's shy. Touches, even to areas that aren't considered taboo (the arms, hands, shoulders, lower legs) may be interpreted as sexual cues if done at too early a stage in the relationship. She may think you're just trying to have a casual sexual relationship, which will usually scare away most girls. Girls will generally break the touch barrier themselves when they're ready.

She may look away and she might blush a little. Be careful though; you don't want to stare her down. A good move is to look away, and if she likes you she will shoot you glances. Watch for that. And be courteous. Open doors. Do kind things, girls love that.

Respect her friends and their ideas and opinions. Always speak highly of her and never talk trash about her. It will damage her reputation and yours. Hopefully then it will work both ways - she will be tolerant of your friends. Be careful not to compliment her friends too much, however. Example: You may say "Your friends seem cool. We should hang out with them and my friends some time, I think they'd get along". You may not say "Sally is so hot. She has the nicest eyes". You may think getting her jealous is a good idea, but it just makes them angry and hurt. Doing this could also sow discord in her friendships, you may actually create bad feelings between her and her friend(s), so make it very clear that you're interested in her only, and that you're merely acquaintances with her friends.

Have your friends be nice to her It's a fantastic thing when your friends don't make a total fool of you. Warn them ahead of time and avoid topics pertaining to embarrassing moments of your past or awkward jokes that make very little sense. Don't introduce her to your friends right away though. You want her to like you, not start dating one of your buddies. If your friends like to embarrass you, try to avoid them altogether.

Be polite to her parents. Be kind to everyone, especially them. Don't be too over-the-top charming with the parents, however, or they'll think that you have something to hide.Be willing make sure that you and her father get along as he will be looking out for his daughter.

Don't criticize her. Unless she asks for constructive criticism. Even in these cases, she probably wants you to compliment her.

Be romantic, but not over the top. If you've been dating for a while you may attempt a grand romantic gesture, otherwise, you'll look like a stalker. It's also okay to be a little cheesy, like giving her a bouquet of roses and a loving poem. It may sound like a bad idea, but girls will find it thoughtful if it came from your heart. A better idea than being cheesy is to really LISTEN to her and remember things she likes. Then take her somewhere she's mentioned wanting to go, or buy her the books she's been wanting and hide a little note inside. Flowers and candy are really cliche and don't really mean much since anyone can just buy someone flowers. Showing you've been listening to her wants and needs goes a LOT farther than roses!!

Start talking to her casually. If you don't know her, make friendly conversation. Ask for the time, and/or compliment her watch. Avoid throwing too many compliments about clothes or shoes around: that might make women think that you are homosexual as many gay men are fashion-forward.

Do not play "hard to get". Sure, you'll get their attention for a day or two then after a while, the girl will end up frustrated, and she'll think you don't find interest in her anymore.
  • At the same time, don't be an "easy catch". Girls will generally lose interest in guys who just fall into the palms of their hands. You should still present a challenge to win over, such as not constantly trying to talk to her whenever she's in your presence, don't be a "goody two-shoes" all of the time (the perfect mannered, completely friendly, always happy kind of guy), and in general try to give off an attitude like you're interested, but not completely devoted (make it obvious that you're still hanging out with friends, doing personal hobbies, etc). Devotion comes when you're actually in a relationship, before that you're just flirting. At the same time, never show any special interest in another girl. All you'll succeed in doing is either make her think you're not interested in a serious relationship (or worse, she may think you're just trying to "hook up" with any possible girl), or you'll hurt her feelings.

Don't get obsessed with her. If she's one of your prospective first romances, it's hard not to spend every waking moment thinking about her. Not only will this drive you insane, but it will make the possible rejection devastating. Continue with your normal hobbies and entertainment and hang out with your normal friends. Don't bother trying to push her completely from your mind, as you're in love, there's no on/off switch. Whenever you start thinking excessively about her, just find something to do, such as reading, watching a movie, play some video games, etc.

Hum in her presence. She might think of you whenever she hears that song. And she'll probably be impressed by your good taste in music. Some girls have actually dumped guys or stopped liking guys when they insulted the music they like. So, it's OK not to like her music, but don't be insulting her favorite singer(s) or band(s)! Try to figure out what music you BOTH like.

Inside jokes: Start an inside joke with her! By doing this the two of you will share a secret connection that is shared between only the two of you. This will make her feel special, included and closer to you. It will also give you an easy-to-come-up-with conversation starter. But keep in mind, if you overuse the inside joke, it could quickly go from fun to boring, so only use it when you must.

Hug her:Most girls love being hugged, (as long as you don't come off as a sleaze when you hug her). There are plently of oppurtunities to hug a girl, for example; after meetings, before and after school, if she is upset, etc. If your brave, tell her you enjoy her hugs and her company (This ought to make her feel special).

Tell her how you feel: Most girls love to share their emotions, so if you share yours with them they will greatly appreciate it. Tell her you think she is a great friend, or tell her you think she is cute. If you have a crush on a girl i'm not saying you have to tell her, but telling her simple sweet things can really impress her. Guys who share their emotions are a lot cuter then guys who do not.

Touch her: Eventually you will have to break the touch barrier, and if you already have then touch her occasionally. Do not touch her in a sensul way if she is not interested, just be friendly about it; try touching her gently on shoulder, her hand or the small of her back. Your touch can be very comforting to a girl.

Opposites attract. You may not seem to have anything in common, but do not give up on a relationship if you realize that her personality is the polar opposite of yours.

Show your funny side. A lot of women look for sense of humor in a partner. You should however be mindful of their reactions to your jokes and avoid offensive humor. Unless they like that. Find out if she likes comedy. If she watches Comedy Central or other readily-accessible comedy, find out her favorite comedian or favorite impression and try something along the same lines for her.

Make her feel good. This is a really good thing that impresses girls. They love it when you let them know you care for them. If she's sad, just simply put your arm around her neck. Make her happy as much as you can. Flirt with her, hold her hand it will make her feel special.

Don't ever make fun of your friends around her. If you do, it might make her think that you're a jerk. When someone makes fun of other people, it makes a woman wonder what they might be saying about HER when she's not around!

Be interesting: Do something creative, something extraordinary or something that others don't usually do. This will draw attention your way, it creates a question mark for the girl about you, she will be dying to know more about you and no doubt she will find you intriguing. Joing a mixture of sporting clubs and intellectual clubs will make you come off as an intersting guy who loves to exercise both his body and mind... very attractive to some.

Be open: Now, you don't have to share too many secrets with her, but sprinkle a little just to keep her interested. Don't irritate her by repeating questions she doesn't want to answer, if she doesn't want to be open about everything, don't sweat it. Always keep your face glowing and charming and use positive body language to keep yourself open for conversation.

Don't ignore her: Don't ever ignore her messages, if she sends you a text or email then that means she has been thinking of you and wants to chat. Make her feel like you always have time for her, she will adore this, girls love to receive an interesting message back from you, keep her wanting to talk to you.

Tease her: You could try teasing her if you like, (depending on her personality) believe it or not, most girls liked to be teased (If it's in a light-hearted way). It can be about anything, as long as she knows you are joking. Be careful not to overdo it, and make sure that your humor is clear (you do not want to sound like a fool).


  • An important tip for complimenting women: Instead of saying "That's a pretty dress" or "I like your outfit",. say "You look really great in that dress." Compliment the woman, not the article of clothing!
  • Never touch a girl on her hips until you get really serious. Make a romantic move if you feel ready. She will feel important, and that someone actually likes her. If she says to stop, stop. Nothing is worse than a girl seeing you as a harasser. If she acts a little odd, stop. Don't take it personally because some girls just don't know how to act around guys. Do it another day if this happens.
  • Show sympathy and affection. If the girl you really enjoy being around is sad or hurt, give her a quick hug. Don't just say that you're sorry and you hope she feels better. This works very well, because then the girl knows you care about her.
  • If you have braces,nnm glasses and acne... don't be disheartened! Most girls don't mind what's on the outside but don't be a total scruff. Girls put a lot of effort into their appearance, perhaps you should do the same. But don't think just because you have braces, glasses, or acne, that the world is over, sometimes it works! Lots of girls think braces and glasses are attractive, and many girls can get past a bad skin complexion (although they may tease you about it).
  • Have good posture!
  • Don't act tough or try to be a thug. This doesn't attract girls.
  • Don't follow her around everywhere. It automatically gives you a reputation as a stalker, and it will freak her out. Even following her just a little can create a stalker rep., depending on how you act. How you act can determine whether she will actually want you to be around her all the time or if even just seeing your face is too much contact. if you know she sees you as a stalker, lay off because trying to do damage control tends to just worsen your situation, instead try to get a friend of your or of hers to help your issue.
  • If she just doesn't get that you like her (which most likely won't happen because girls are pretty good at detecting this kind of stuff!) drop hints.
  • Don't play games. Waiting a few days to call her, showing up a little late to things or anything like that is only proving you are unreliable, a fake and a loser. Likewise, don't tolerate it if she does any of these things to you.
  • Use correct grammar when texting her or talking to her. If you don't then she will think that you aren't very intelligent and that will turn certain girls off. (E.G. use predictive (T9) text so that you can't spell something wrong in a text, if you're unsure of apostrophes and such just say the full word (e.g. "they're" is "they are", but "their" means a group of peoples' belongings) also if you're not the best at getting this right in conversation then read up on how to speak proper english)
  • While it's important to connect to her friends, you must avoid coming off as a player, as players make girls feel unimportant and 'just another girl'. If a girl's friends do not approve of you, this will influence her opinion of you.
  • Don't be weird around her. NOTE: Weird and unusual are different things. Some girls will see your unusual attribute as unique and special, especially if it endears you because it's a secret from one of your friends.
  • Share a secret with her and hope she shares one with you (e.g., strike up a conversation starting with something along the lines of "Do you want to know a secret?" If she reciprocates then it shows she trusts you and knows you trust her. DON'T be disheartened if she doesn't share one back straight away, she will take your secret as a sign of your trust and this will build your relationship.
  • Be yourself. Don't be fake.
  • Don't stand in the back and be quiet all the time, you'll look weird.
  • Always be careful and respectful.
  • Some girls may be put off by such early outbursts of physical contact - the problem can be solved by spending more time with the girl.
  • make sure to smell good. Girls love it when you have cologne on or maybe a little axe. the smell sometimes gets on their clothes and theyll always think of you. Also she will know when you are near because of your scent.
  • Be a kind and considerate person. Don't be jerk or try and show off, as this is not a gesture appreciated by most girls
If you have followed all the steps above and it didn't work, don't feel disheartened. There's other girls out there that will be much more appreciative than the one who turned you down.
Also, it says above that some girls like to talk about themselves- remember, some girls do. Some also would rather not have you obsessing about her hobbies, sports, etc. Be cool. Relate what she's saying to something about you, and then continue the conversation. It's a balancing act. You don't want to seem to into-yourself, but you also don't want to make her carry the whole conversation.
Remember to talk about yourself and your own hobbies etc. That way you come off as a good conversationalist and as a person with a life. DON'T hog the conversations though and be sure to LISTEN and find out about her too.
Every girl is different! Find out if she likes tattoos before you show her the skull and crossbones tattoo on your chest! (It's probably a bad idea to get a skull and crossbones tattoo on your chest (or elsewhere))
Never rush her or pressure her or show her a bad attitude.
Don't talk about her weight or ask her anything related to this subject. Even the girls with the most attractive bodies have insecurities. Even a comment intended as a joke could seriously hurt her feelings. Leave this subject alone!!!! If she asks you about how she looks boost her confidence, tell her something nice or flirt.
At the same time, keep your own weight in check. Eat healthfully and work out. Don't go too crazy with the body building, but being toned never hurts. Watch out for skinny-fat (where you are skinny but flabby).
Girls love confident guys, but don't be cocky. A cocky guy turns girls off.
If you have problems with shyness, think of the most confident person you know and of what they would do in each situation. Don't be fake, just change your mindset.
Girls like that you care enough to buy them something. Don't go overboard and get flowers for her unless the time calls for it or she is very likely to think you did something wrong.
Some girls don't really know what to talk about with a guy so they might tend to talk about things you don't care about or go on and on about who said what. Don't be mean about it even though you're fighting boredom because it could have taken her a lot of courage to talk to you. Just show interest and change the subject to something more interesting, or politely exit the conversation.
Do not chew gum when talking to her. You should throw it away if there are no trash bins, do not chew with your mouth open, pop, or blow bubbles.
Don't ever talk about sports unless she likes sports. If the girl does like sports, she will probably be happy to talk about them. Another thing, don't boast about how you beat another person, whether it is in a game or sports. You can bring it up, but bragging makes you look egotistical.
Never, ever, make fun of her. If the two of you are still only good friends, but you want to start dating, etc; then don't. Yeah, it would be funny if you said it to one of your guy friends, but It could be very offensive to her. And if you DO make fun of her, don't giver her the guilt trip and say "Oh, it's your fault you're angry. I was just joking".
Don't ever raise your voice to get a point across.
If you curse make sure it doesn't bother her or else it'll probably make her mad. Plenty of girls are okay with swearing, but others are not. Be respectful of her opinion. Also, girls don't normally find cursing and fighting attractive, only immature and stupid girls (even if you are defending her) so be sure to watch what you say and do.
Somes girls are natural flirts but aren't interested in you. Just because she hangs out all the time with you, hugs you and does other seductive things doesn't mean she likes you. Take things slowly so you can really know.

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